Archive for December 7th, 2005

December 7th, 2005

Can I Help You?

Posted in The Job - Experience by 200

So there you are sat at the side of a busy motorway behind a BDV (Broken Down Vehicle) wondering why people still can’t fathom out that in order to get to the end of a journey one must have sufficient fuel at the start of that journey, and checking the rear-view mirror like a man with a nervous tic, waiting for the HGV with the specially chosen-nodding-dog driver to veer off the carriageway into your rear-end, when some other numpty pulls up on the hard shoulder behind you.

You get out and walk back carefully monitoring the oncoming traffic and direct the driver to the nearside of the hard shoulder as he seems to want to stand inches away from the 40 ton artic thundering past at 60mph (have you seen the damage one of those wing mirrors can do to a human skull at 60mph?)

Turns out he’s got a slow puncture, hasn’t been arsed to fix it and continues driving on it. He’s seen your patrol car and assumes you have a foot-pump. We all carry them, right?

Do you:

a)       Explain politely that it would have been better for him to have changed his tyre as soon as he realised it had a fault as driving on such rubber for three weeks could be hazardous to his health?

b)       Explain politely that the hard shoulder of a motorway is not the safest of places to conduct a conversation on the ins and outs of why he can’t afford a new tyre due to a recent loss of job and new pregnancy in the family and that he should pull off at the next junction?

c)       Retrieve said foot-pump from the limitless supply of various tools kept specially to assist motorists who can’t be arsed to pay for a subscription to a breakdown service?

d)       Notice the vehicle is untaxed, do a PNC check and find the vehicle is also uninsured, sieze the vehicle, call a garage and have it removed from the motorway leaving the motorist to get out of the recovery truck back at the garage’s base and walk the 75 miles he’s travelled, on a dangerous tyre, back home?

Someone told me years ago that it is often better to keep one’s mouth closed and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.