November 28th, 2007

Ticking the Boxes

Posted in The Job - Experience by 200

So I’ve been off the streets for a little while now, I guess it’s time for a mid-term report.

Firstly, do I miss my old job, that of a front-line officer?

On the whole I have to say "no, I don’t".

For a start, the wettest I’ve got is jogging across the car park to the Control Room at the start f a shift. It sure beats the hell out of standing in the middle of the road in the pouring rain. The kind of rain which literally soaks you to the skin. The kind of rain you know you’ve been in when you get back to the nick & have to wring your underpants out.

I’ve not filled out a single meaningless form since I’ve been here. Come to that I’ve not filled out a single meaningful form either (yes, I know there aren’t may of them!)

I don’t get emails from people in offices asking me why I haven’t done something or telling me to fill in yet another meaningless form. Well, apart from the occasional numpty who still doesn’t know I’m not on shift anymore, then at least I can have the pleasure in returning it saying ‘not in my remit’.

I’ve not been assaulted, even Gail hasn’t tried to hit me yet.

Do I miss anything? Well the truth of the matter is I don’t actually miss much at all. About the only thing I miss is driving my patrol car. I really enjoyed that. It probably won’t go down well in some quarters but driving to a blues & twos job & honing the art of driving fast but safe can be bloody exciting. I miss some of the camararderie, you do build up a close knit team. I also find working with so many women, er, different. In the last 25 plus years I’ve only ever worked on teams which were a minimum of 70 per cent male, now I’m in the minority. I don’t dislike, I just find it different.

I get to go home on time. Every day. No more text messages home to say I won’t be in for a while or asking the wife to cancel the arrangements for the evening because I’ve got 3 scrotes in the bin & the solicitor won’t be here for another 2 hours.

So, on the whole, I reckon I can hack this for another year or so until the 200 weeks is finally up.

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