I’ve decided if ever I need to ring the police when I retire, I’m going to end whatever it is I’m reporting with, "Oh, and he called me racist names."
You get a higher response when you mention the ‘R’ word. Anything with a hint of racism takes a higher priority over most other things. You have to give it a higher grading when you take a call & create a job on the system. As the controller you have to make sure it’s assigned within a squillionth of a nano-second otherwise some jobsworth in the Diversity Office will be on the Bat Phone to the Ops Room inspector asking why nobody has been sent to the racist job yet.
So when I retire, everything I report will be a racist incident.
Surely nobody is so manipulative as to do such an immoral thing?
One of my officers went to a typical racist incident this week. An Asian taxi driver with a customer who had failed to pay £2 of the fare & had disappeared into a nearby house.
The officer turned up and took details, knocked on the door and persuaded the perp’ to pay the outstanding balance to the taxi driver. As the job had come in as a racist incident the officer naturally had to record the intricacies on a special form, one for racist incidents.
Officer: "And what racist language did they use?"
Driver: "Well to be honest they didn’t use any racist language but my controller told me to say they called me a paki because you get a better response."
Who would have thought someone could possibly abuse the system to get a better response from the police than anyone else, you wouldn’t believe it, would you?