I don’t follow horse racing but I generally take part on the Grand National sweepstakes whenever we have them at work. This usually involves taking one of my fine English pound coins out of my pocket & throwing it down the drain in exchange for a tiny piece of paper cut out of the sports section of the Daily Mirror which has some ridiculously made-up name thereon.
Apparently, some bloke called Tony McCoy won it this year. If that wasn’t highlight enough of his weekend, he also got to meet colleagues from Merseyside Police shortly after the race.
McCoy was leaving the Aintree course when he decided to give his mother the good news. Unfortunately for him he thought it would be OK to ring her from his mobile while driving his vehicle on the public road.
The Old Bill pulled him over slapped a Ã‚Â£60 fine & 3 points on him.
McCoy said: “I couldn’t believe it when they did me for three points. You would have thought that on Saturday of all days they might have let me off, especially as I was on the phone to my mum in Ireland st the time.” Which sounds pretty much like a straight cough to me.
His mum said, in some strange nonsensical & twisted logic: “I only thought that sort of thing happened in Ireland, as the Irish get blamed for everything, but it appears it happens in the UK as well. They must have known he had just won the Grand National, surely? He must have been the only sober one there so he must have been an easy target, eh?”
She is clearly nothing like my mum. She would have been in uproar that I had been done by the police. Not because talking on a mobile phone whilst driving is both illegal & dangerous, but that I had waited until I had finished the race, collected the prize, celebrated with colleagues, been interviewed on TV, got washed & changed, walked to the car park, got in & driven out of the course THEN decided to ring her.
Anyway, next week Ill blog about how the Irish caused World War II, facilitated the spreading of AIDs & blocked the drains outside my house so much that the garden was swimming in shite for 3 days.