February 22nd, 2010

Policing by the Script

Posted in The Job - General by 200

It seems that some detectives are annoyed about the happy-go-lucky show, Eastenders. They fear that the public will think that solving murders is as easy as chatting to the regulars of the Queen Vic for a few minutes a week, and that taking bribes & chasing innocent victims off roofs is par for the course.

I refer, of course, to the murder (fictional) of Archie Mitchell which reached its climax last week when the show put out a live episode, the follow up of which has led to the local Old Bill closing the case believing (wrongly) that the murderer has met his death in a swallow dive onto the fruit & veg stall in Albert Square.

Detective Inspector Alan Kalbfell of City of London Police, is a spokesman for the National Detectives Forum, he said: “It is frustrating to see our trade portrayed in such a bad manner.  EastEnders is watched by a broad range of people, from young to old, and they will think this is how detectives operate. It’s not.

“There is no doubt this is damaging to our profession. There is no way that 99.9 per cent of people doing our job would dream off discussing an ongoing case with people on the street if it could prove detrimental to the case. Yet EastEnders have no problem showing this. It makes us look unprofessional.

I suspect a TV soap making us look unprofessional is the least of our worries, we tend to do a good job of that ourselves, sometimes.

A spokeswoman for the Police Federation said: “We just hope that EastEnders viewers realise the show is completely fictional because real detectives do not act like this.”

Hmmm, not much hope there, then.

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  1. the_leander says:

    Way back when, whilst training to be a cold calling phone monkey for a much loved former state owned gas supplier (That’s right, it was probably me, or someone sat near me that kept interrupting your dinner, night after night, despite promising for days or even weeks at a time to stop), I was told about the 3-10 rule for marketing:

    This rule, put simply states that if a company or group do something right for someone, that person will tell maybe 3 others about it. But that if that same company or group screw up, at least 10 people will get told about it.

    Well, roll on the security work.

    February 23rd, 2010 at 05:14

  2. Me says:

    The BEEB hates the police just like their masters at NewLab and they all live in cloud cuckoo land…to quote Andrew Marr…

    “The BBC is not impartial or neutral. It’s a publicly funded, urban organisation with an abnormally large number of young people, ethnic minorities and gay people. It has a liberal bias not so much a party-political bias. It is better expressed as a cultural liberal bias”

    I think this extends to the BBC’s perception of organisations like the police….all detectives are rough, shady dodgy people and uniformed officers are all a bit thick and slap happy.

    A good detective is worth his/her weight in gold and equally there are many in CID who are just there to get away form all the crap that comes with being on Response (and who can blame them for that?)

    February 23rd, 2010 at 06:13

  3. john says:

    The detectives can rest…..the press have more interesting things to write about….like the ACPO:


    February 23rd, 2010 at 09:10

  4. Hogday says:

    I’m an East End bloke and I object to the way that “Eastenders” portrays Eastenders. I’ve never said, “sorted”, “well art of order” or “you slag” and never refer to a fine dinner as a “slap up meal with all the twimmings an a luvverly bottle ‘O bubbly”. Yet this is constantly used in the script. I really miss “Crossroads”. At least the police portrayed in that soap chewed on a piece of straw and sounded stupid. By the way, what channel is Crossroads on these days? Has Stan got a new donkey jacket yet?

    February 23rd, 2010 at 14:28

  5. Fee says:

    You mean EastEnders isn’t real????? Those weren’t real detectives???

    Next thing I know, you’ll be telling me there’s no tooth fairy.

    February 23rd, 2010 at 15:14

  6. pc hawkeye says:

    It is real Fee, it must be, it’s on the telly and made by the BBC, they wouldn’t promote anything that’s not real, would they?

    February 23rd, 2010 at 20:22

  7. Tony F says:

    I always have the hope that ‘right benders’ and ‘horrornatoin street’ all go on a holiday on a big aeroplane. This then crashes onto a small village called ‘emmerdrivell’. There are no survivors. On the other hand I don’t watch such shite.

    February 23rd, 2010 at 21:19

  8. Blueknight says:

    Casualty was very anti Police. Not sure if it is now but they lost me as a viewer

    February 23rd, 2010 at 21:38

  9. Hogday says:

    Oi Tony, they film Emmerdell up the road from me. I can provide an 8 figure grid ref if you have the aircraft.

    February 25th, 2010 at 18:43

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